She said her name was "party"
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
