He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Randomize
