we have officially lost it.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
