I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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