that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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