Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
