I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
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