just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
