Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
