You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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