god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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