Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize