i wish starbucks made bloody marys
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
