bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize