Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize