shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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