dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
