i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
