i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Randomize
