woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
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