That's intense
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
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