it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
