You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
We don't watch enough power rangers
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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