I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize