He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
