i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
He felt like a one man threesome
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
