Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
