So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize