just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
false alarm, still single
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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