I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize