You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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