We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
