I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
