All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
