lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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