Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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