Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize
