You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
