She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize