i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
