The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
PANTIES FOUND
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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