Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
