do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
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