He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Sorry about my life...
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
