Just cropdusted the office
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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