I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize
