oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
