she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
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