I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Randomize
