His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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