He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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