You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
