Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
